the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
