3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
