Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Randomize
