Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
She announced her abortion via fbk
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Randomize
