I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
