physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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