and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
