your room smells of hookers.
And success
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
drinking out of a sandbucket again
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
