whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Randomize