I only kidnapped one of them. chill
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
