Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
