the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
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