He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Farmville is her only friend.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
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