didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Randomize
