It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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