Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
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