tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
