we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
