So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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