Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
