Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Randomize
