She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize