the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Randomize
