Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I bet i've been more pregnant than you.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize
