I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
