I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
