If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Randomize