lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
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