I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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