I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
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