is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
Randomize
