12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
