I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
