I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
