We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
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