Sry I called you an 8
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize