Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
Got drunk with him at an Irish pub ended up losing him for twenty minutes when I finally find him his piss drunk singing Irish folk music with a group of Irish guys and a midget
He meets the coolest people when he's drunk
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
