Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
