That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
