Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
