guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
