Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
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