Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
How's work?
Spinning.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
So much Jack, so little girl.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
