This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
