I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Randomize
