question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
