I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
