I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
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