I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
Enjoy the penises
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
