She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
I'm crying at a bar by myself drinking a pear martini drawing things dicks are scared of. How was your day?
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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