I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
