I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
